


en serrant

by bushelsofdicks



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Emotions, M/M, Sex, maid outfit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-28
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-12 04:28:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29754072
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bushelsofdicks/pseuds/bushelsofdicks
Summary: erwin loses an arm so levi puts on a maid dress to make him feel better about it. honestly, just let me have this.
Relationships: Levi Ackerman/Erwin Smith
Comments: 6
Kudos: 79





	en serrant

**Author's Note:**

> this pairing ruined my life. that's all, that's the author's note.

_Summer_

The castle is abandoned – the rich inhabitants fled months before the rest of the citizens, escaping to where they believed might be safer from this particular point on the map.

And they were right, of course. They had the intelligence of military minds at their every beckon. The poorer citizens didn’t have this privilege, and so they died first.

Levi stares down at a bowl of spoiled fruit on a large golden table. He gags silently and turns away, swiftly pulling a handkerchief from his pocket and pressing it against his mouth.

Erwin is staring at a bookcase, his hands placed on his hips. He whistles lowly, impressed by the collection.

Levi tries to forget the fruit.

“How many of them do you think survived?” Erwin asks, his gaze nailed to the books.

“None. Picked out on the way out.”

“Fairly pessimistic assumption.”

“Realistic.”

Erwin turns his head to look at Levi. “I’d say survival instincts might have saved one or two.”

Levi folds his handkerchief and places it back into his breast-pocket. “People like them don’t need survival instincts. They pay others to worry for him.”

Erwin smirks, nodding slowly. “A fair point.”

Levi is amused at how playful Erwin is being right now. He’s typically one-track minded when it comes to this sort of thing. On the other hand, they have nothing else to do here except perhaps collect anything of importance before they all move out tomorrow morning.

Erwin moves over to a large suitcase of effects and bends to flip it open. He pauses then reaches down to pick something up. He turns slowly to face Levi, holding what appears to be a small maid’s uniform. It’s black, long sleeved, down to about the knees, with white trim. He’s pinching the fabric on the shoulders between his index fingers and thumbs, making the thing look even more dainty than it’s meant to be. He raises his eyebrows. “Oh my.”

Levi grimaces. “Put that thing down, it’s probably unwashed.”

Erwin continues to stare at it, glances over at Levi, then back at the dress. “Huh.”

He lets the thing fall back into the suitcase.

Levi feels the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end. “What was that?”

Erwin looks at him like he doesn’t know what Levi is questioning.

“That sound you made,” Levi continues, but it comes out as more of a warning this time.

“What sound?” Erwin is having a hard time pretending he doesn’t know what Levi is saying. Erwin is not good at pretending. 

“When you picked up the dress. You said ‘huh’.”

Erwin rubs at the back of his head. “Well, it's the sound of air leaving my mouth."

Levi stares at him, his eyes wide with rage. When Erwin meets his gaze, he smiles. “Alright. I thought you’d look nice in something like that.”

Levi grabs onto the backrest of the ornate little chair in front of him and hears the wood crack under his fingers.

Erwin brows come to rest at the sound. “I’d never ask you to do something like that. I was just imagining.” He seems slightly embarrassed.

“Imagining,” Levi practically whispers, like Erwin just stabbed him.

Erwin moves over to him. “Are you angry with me? I was only joking. I’m sorry if I offended you,” he says, sincere. The stoicism takes over. 

Erwin only acts this when he feels like he overstepped a line.

Levi is still horrified about the dress but he’s more horrified about the prospect of Erwin feeling like he needs to hold back with Levi and revert back to how he is with others.

“I’m not offended. I’m confused,” Levi says. It’s not exactly a lie.

Erwin shrugs. He looks like he wants to touch Levi’s face, maybe even kiss him. He knows better. “I’m alright with leaving it at that.”

Levi finally lets go of the splintered wood he was clinging to, white knuckled. “I want an explanation at some point.”

Erwin smiles. "I'll try."

_Autumn_

Levi is used to long silences.

In fact, he prefers them.

Erwin’s demeanor falls perfectly within this preference. During the emptiness between missions, they spend hours on end together without a single word exchanged.

Erwin sits reading, writing, brainstorming formations. He scratches at the bridge of his nose every so often. He takes small breaks to roll his shoulder, forming therapeutic circles with what remains of his arm, tilting his head from side to side to release stress, his blue eyes closed, heavy brows furrowed in thought.

Levi is usually cleaning during these mutual silences. He picks an area and works hard. It keeps his mind off anything else. Erwin was ashamed at first, telling Levi it wasn’t his position to do this sort of thing. Levi had to convince him that he genuinely found it therapeutic. He would be doing this regardless, elsewhere if not here.

On the days Levi isn’t around, Erwin’s study fills with things. Messes form in every possible corner, it’s almost impressive.

Levi grimaces as he picks up a half-finished cup of tea that has already formed a circle of mold on the surface of the liquid. He closes his eyes and breathes out slowly, then moves the cup over to the rolling cart, already piled with garbage.

He stands up straight, stretching out his back. He glances at Erwin and lowers the front of the handkerchief tied around the bottom half of his face.

He looks stressed. He’s been this way since he lost his arm at the end of summer. He was never an especially happy person, but whatever was left in there diminished slowly. Still, this week seems especially hard for Erwin.

Fucking usually helps. So, when Erwin doesn’t give him any signs that he wants it, Levi begins to worry slightly. They only had sex once since Erwin's injury and he seemed upset with himself for not being able to do the sort of things he did before with ease. 

Levi never makes the first move, sexually, romantically. It’s not that he doesn’t want to, he’s been working up to it, he simply isn’t there yet.

Erwin isn’t very overt about his hints, but they still exist. He grasps Levi’s wrist as he was walking away, squeezing slightly, his icy blue eyes staring hungrily when Levi turned to meet his gaze. Sometimes even the way he says his name is be a hint.

Any sexual experiences Levi had up until then consisted simply of dropping his pants and bending over against some sort of surface. It was a release, nothing more than that, no words exchanged – he had a valve that needed to be adjusted every so often so he wouldn’t go about murdering everyone from the pent-up tension inside him. There were no hints, no build up. He used to think it was effective and direct, but now realizes it killed any sense of intimacy.

Communication, he learns, as almost as important in here as it is out there,

Still, Levi loses all sense of directness as he stands here watching Erwin, who is clearly agonizing over his thoughts. Levi knows the commander would benefit from fucking and yet, he can’t bring himself to say it.

He feels angered by his own mediocrity. Erwin is good at this sort of thing: making decisions, saying what needs to be said. Levi lacks the conviction, he’d rather just follow.

His mouth twists in annoyance and he turns away towards several of the big briefcases. They usually contain Erwin’s clothing, but never just. They’re filled with a mix of items that don’t typically belong under one category. It makes the back Levi’s skull itch.

Erwin rarely has time to unpack everything, he just throws it off into a corner and then mumbles to himself angrily when he can’t seem to locate the things he’s looking for.

Levi will typically point at the suitcase with the lost item in it and Erwin will snap his fingers and smile at him happily, like Levi just helped him remember an ancient secret.

He begins to rummage through one of them, and it’s the usual: clothes, notebooks, compasses, belts.

Levi pauses, his blood running cold.

He grabs his handkerchief from his pocket and bends over, careful not to touch it himself; he picks up the offending item and stands up slowly, turning on the spot to face Erwin.

After a few moments, Erwin notices Levi staring at him and glances up. His furrowed eyebrows part and his mouth slowly hangs open.

The look of surprise slowly turns into amusement and he covers his mouth with his hand. “Ah,” he says, from beneath his fingers, like he’s trying to stop Levi from seeing him laugh.

“The fuck is this doing here?” Levi asks, holding out the maid dress like it’s a bag full of shit.

Erwin drops his hand and laughs, loud. It’s louder than Levi has heard from him in months. If this wasn’t so disturbing, Levi might enjoy it.

Levi thinks maybe he broke him, but Erwin hasn’t looked this genuinely pleased in a long time, so he’ll take it.

“I’m. I’m sorry,” Erwin says, reaching up to wipe the side of his eye. “After that day...I kept it.”

“I can see that.”

“You said you were waiting for an explanation,” Erwin says, in mock seriousness. “Isn’t this what you wanted?”

“Don’t.”

“You did.”

“Well? Go on.”

Erwin licks his lips and sighs. “I just figure you’re quite…small in stature. Don’t look at me like that, you know I don’t mean it in an offensive way. You’re very tactical, if you weren’t the size you are, we’d suffer tremendous losses.”

“You’ve only just called me short, anything else?”

“Yes. You’re small, you like to clean. I’d like to fuck you in that dress, I think,” Erwin says, relaxing slightly in his chair.

“So, that’s what it was,” Levi says, not entirely sure what sort of victory this is. Hearing Erwin say that so bluntly made his intestines twist. He almost physically reacts to the wording. “That’s what you thought from the beginning.”

“Yes, and you knew that,” Erwin continues, like he’s suddenly tired. “You just wanted to hear me say it.”

“You’re demented.”

Erwin shrugs. “You learn to appreciate what honesty will do when you’re in my position. I don’t have many inhibitions anymore,” he lifts his arm stump. Levi wishes he’d stop using that as a rueful punchline to his upsetting, unfunny jokes.

Levi throws the dress onto the loveseat next to the suitcase. “Glad I dragged it out of you.”

“You can throw it away,” Erwin says, picking up a page from his lap again. “Honestly, I just kept it to remember that time. It was a good time,”

Levi’s heart sinks. Erwin is smiling gently down at a piece of paper, pressing it against his lap and making a marking on it. It’s hard to watch him struggle to do simple things. The sudden change from being completely capable of taking anything on to this was very hard for him.

Erwin would never admit it sober but during a few of their alcohol steeped nights, Erwin apologized against Levi’s lips for nothing in particular. Levi knew, though – then and now.

-

Levi washes the dress fives times.

By the fifth time, it has faded considerably.

He places it on his chair and then steps away from it, staring.

He starts to pace.

It is absolutely insane that he is even beginning to think about entertaining Erwin’s deranged fantasy. It’s ‘emasculating’, which is something that Levi was taught simply by circumstance to hate. Whatever it meant. 

Erwin eventually coaxed it out of him that he really doesn’t mind feeling small.

This, though, this is something else.

Would something like this really make Erwin happy? He's a complex man, but Levi has come to learn quickly that he finds joy in simple things.

Still… to call this simple might not be completely honest.

Levi mutters to himself and reaches out to grab the dress, deftly unbuttoning the back. He thinks vaguely of how the others might react seeing him right now as he shrugs off his dress shirt. His neck is burning up with embarrassment like the inanimate objects in his temporary room have somehow developed sentience and are now jeering.

He finally manages to pull the thing on and feels a wave of nausea when he realizes it fits almost perfectly. It’s a little tight around his shoulders but otherwise, it feels almost comfortable.

He turns slowly to face the mirror resting against the wall. His thin legs stick out from the bottom of the dress in a shock of almost sickly white. He almost bursts out laughing.

He hasn’t felt that particular tickle in his throat in years. He reckons Erwin maybe infected him earlier with his own laugh.

Levi is almost manic. He isn’t angry or disgusted, this is so absurd that it’s freeing.

He thinks briefly about how Erwin probably knows deep down that this is funny. Maybe he knew Levi would put it on all along. Erwin has a habit of knowing things before they happen.

He stops himself of thinking further about that because Erwin warned him once that it was hurtful when Levi assumed Erwin was constantly plotting.

Levi looks over at the table next to the mirror. A half finished bottle of liquor from a few nights ago still sits there, carefully placed.

He reaches out and spins the cap off, walking over to the lone couch in the room, next to the bed, sitting down. The fabric on the bottom of the dress puffs up as he drops down, his legs spread crudely because he isn’t used to this.

He takes a drink from the bottle, and rests his head against the couch, closing his eyes.

He doesn’t want Erwin to sink deeper into his sad state. He hides it from others but it’s obvious when they’re alone together. He doesn’t want him to be upset anymore – he really can’t stop thinking about it. He probably thinks about it more than he thinks about anything else, it almost distracts him during missions.

He thinks about it so much he’s got a fucking maid dress on just to imagine that it might take Erwin back to a ‘good’ time.

He takes another long drink from the bottle and enjoys the burn at the back of his throat and eyes.

\--

Levi doesn’t realize where he is when he blinks his eyes open. He feels like he’s being moved.

When he really focuses, he realizes Erwin is helping him up from the couch.

Levi freezes and then jolts back from Erwin’s grip, nearly tripping over the now empty bottle of liquor on the floor. It rolls loudly over the hardwood to the other side of the room.

Erwin reaches out to stop Levi from falling. “Hey. Shh. It’s just me.”

Levi attempts to steady himself. There are two Erwins for a second but his eyes finally focus. His head is pounding, he clearly drank too much and fell asleep.

He realizes he’s still wearing the dress. He doesn’t even react, he’s too steeped in his own dysfunction to care.

“Levi,” Erwin says, his voice gentle and almost pained.

Levi clears his throat, trying to stand straight. He holds on to the side of the bed. “Yes,” he replies professionally.

Erwin smiles, Levi thinks his eyes might be glassy with tears, but Levi is also still drunk so he’s likely still imagining sad scenarios.

“Let’s get you to bed,” Erwin says.

Normally Levi would protest to being treated like an inebriated fool, but seeing as he is actually an inebriated fool, he lets Erwin lead him to the bed and push him up into the mattress.

He leans over him and kisses him on the mouth, almost platonic.

Levi reaches out immediately and hooks his arms around Erwin’s neck, pulling him down to a deeper kiss, rolling his tongue into it. Erwin appears completely off guard for a moment, his mouth taking a second to return the kiss. He stops, pulling away.

“Sleep,” he says, his hand pressed to the side of Levi’s face. Levi turns over immediately and sinks into slumber.

\--

When Levi wakes up, he’s under the blankets with Erwin, his arm slung over Erwin’s chest.

He doesn’t remember falling asleep.

His head is pounding. He peers under the blankets because he thinks maybe he imagined the entire dress thing, but no, he’s still wearing it.

Erwin is completely clothed, so they likely did not have sex. This seems almost more humiliating than what he had initially set out to do.

Erwin stirs and turns over to Levi. He blinks at him then ducks his face down to kiss him on the lips.

Levi hesitantly returns it. His mouth likely tastes like hell.

“Good morning.”

“Mm,” Levi says.

Erwin is always oddly endeared with Levi in the mornings.

“Did you put that thing on for me?”

Levi sighs and turns from his side onto his back, his eyes still closed. “Yes.”

“You didn’t have to.”

“Yeah, well.”

Erwin appears deep in thought for a moment. “I feel like…I ask you to do too many things.”

Levi wipes at his groggy face with a hand, letting it rest there on his forehead. “Literally your job."

“Not here. Maybe out there.”

“You never ask me to do anything here,” Levi says, and realizes he sounds almost petulant about it.

“I don’t want anything you haven’t already given me, you know,” Erwin says, reaching out his hand to touch Levi’s hair. It’s likely greasy, he hasn’t showered since yesterday.

“But if you did,” Levi mumbles. “You’d tell me?” He can feel Erwin staring at him. He suddenly becomes acutely aware that he’s still in a maid dress.

“Yes.”

Levi rolls over onto his side, away from Erwin. Erwin doesn’t make any moves, like he’s worried he might ruin whatever kind of moment they’re having.

Levi tosses the blanket from himself then reaches down and pulls the side of the skirt up over his hip, exposing his ass. The updated technique from dropping his pants. There isn’t much of a response to this for a few seconds, but he soon feels Erwin’s hand grip his bare thigh and his mouth presses against the back of Levi’s neck, hot and wet.

His hand releases Levi's thigh and grips the fabric of the dress on his stomach instead, squeezing to feel Levi underneath as he moves behind him. Levi can feel his clothed hardness pressing up against his ass. 

Erwin eventually relents, opting to hover over Levi instead.

He kisses the fabric at the center of Levi’s chest, breathing in what might have once been the smell of soap now likely replaced with Levi’s own liquor-infused sweat. He continues to kiss down the white trim, pausing at the bunched up fabric of the skirt. He peers up at Levi like he’s asking permission and Levi turns his head to the side to avoid the eye-contact but nods his head.

Erwin lifts the skirt with his hand, pressing his fingers firmly into Levi’s waist, keeping them there. The air is cool against his wet thighs, and he feels Erwin’s stubble rub up against them as he kisses lines down to Levi’s almost painful hardness.

The skirt shifts up, practically covering Erwin’s head. It looks crude from this angle - Levi let’s it happen. He can’t see, but he can feel Erwin’s mouth around him and every movement he makes has a clear purpose to provide pleasure. Levi appreciates this, but Erwin is so thorough it can be overwhelming in a short period of time.

He inadvertently squeezes his thighs against Erwin’s head then feels Erwin tap at his waist with his fingers. He spreads again in case - perish the thought - he accidentally kills his commander like this.

He’s sweating under the dress and he arches and grunts when he feels his orgasm come, reaching down and pulling the skirt off from Erwin’s head so he can grab his hair as he cums.

He lies there as Erwin quietly finishes whatever is left of Levi. He feels rustling as Erwin moves over top of him, watching him breathe as he comes down from his orgasm.

Levi’s eyes are screwed shut but he opens them when he feels Erwin’s lips against his forehead. He doesn’t think he’s ever been kissed like that before - it feels alien, almost uncomfortably domestic.

He feels fear blossom in his chest for a moment, like every new attachment he builds is just an addition to the growing pile of things he could lose at any moment. It makes it worse that the attachments spread from a single source.

“Levi?”

He opens his eyes, still breathing deeply from his nose.

“Are you alright?” Erwin asks, looking concerned. He searches Levi’s face like it was maybe something he did.

Levi nods. “I’m fine.”

Erwin’s expression softens and he ducks his face down to kiss him on the lips then winces slightly as he falls over on his back next to Levi.

“It’s hard to keep myself propped up like that for so long.”

“Because of your arm.”

“Mm. It’s a shame, though. I like watching you.”

Levi scoffs. “The less time you spend looking at me in this, the better.” He maneuvers the sides of the dress down since the entire thing has ridden up. He notices a large tear in the side of the fabric and frowns. He hates this thing but he put so much effort into cleaning it that he feels annoyed to have it lose its purpose so quickly after the act.

“A waste,” Erwin says, noticing the tear too.

“Are you still hard?” Levi asks.

Erwin nods. “But I don’t think I could keep myself propped up enough to be able to do anything about it.”

“And you have no idea how to work around that?” Levi challenges. He was meaning to be facetious, slightly rude, even, but he realizes he gave Erwin more bait than he should because the almost childish, playful aura begins to emanate again.

“Well,” Erwin says, shifting to his side to stare at Levi who turns his head to look back at Erwin. “I’d reckon we could get better results if I’m looking up at you rather than down.”

“Are you asking, or suggesting?”

Erwin wavers, shockingly. “Asking.”

Levi nods, sitting up and pushing Erwin’s bandaged shoulder back and down against the bed, then swings his leg over his waist, straddling him. He tugs the front of Erwin’s waistband, pulling his length out of his pants, glancing at his face once.

His blue eyes are dark with lust, his mouth is hanging slightly open as he watches Levi like he’s the most awe-inspiring thing he’s ever seen.

Levi grabs the vial of oil from the bedside table, shifting back and holding it out over Erwin’s length, watching it pour down onto the head in long strands. Erwin’s head falls back against the pillow, his jaw clenched as Levi strokes him, the slick sounds almost unbearably loud in the quiet room. 

He shifts over Erwin, positioning himself and pulling the sides of the dress up, suddenly becoming embarrassed. Still, Erwin asked.

He deftly sits down, taking all of it in at once. In the beginning it was extremely painful - Erwin is almost comically large, but he was expecting it. He’d never show it on his face or dare make any sort of suggestion that it hurt. He’s good at swallowing down pain and it was one of the less haunting situations in which he’s had to use that skill. 

The pain is dull and familiar now, incredibly welcome. He closes his eyes, feeling Erwin’s hand travel to his thigh, squeezing hard. Levi isn’t sure how much a person could get out of his slender legs, but Erwin seems to enjoy touching them.

The dress is incredibly uncomfortable, Levi is certain it’s leaving red fabric burns on his skin.

Erwin seems to somehow take note of this thought, perhaps by the way Levi moves above him. 

“Take it off,” Erwin mutters.

“It’s okay,” Levi mumbles.

“Take it off,” Erwin says again, his voice steadier, like he’s giving an order.

Levi reaches back and snaps open the last couple remaining buttons on the back. He pulls the thing off with Erwin’s help, throwing it down onto the bed next to him.

He all at once realizes he’s completely naked and at the mercy of Erwin’s investigative stare. There’s really no escape from this situation. 

He moves his hips back and forth, his fingers traveling to the top of Erwin’s hand on his thigh.

A few times, he sees Erwin mouth ‘my God’ or other looking at his face too much throughout - it’s something he’s still getting used to. He generally looks away.

The pleasure builds inside him and Erwin’s hand moves from his thigh to his chest, trailing down his stomach to grip Levi in his hand. He’s throbbing at his point, and the contact makes him hiss and shiver which causes Erwin to piston his up into him when he falters. He’s bouncing almost violently now, and if he was in any realistic state of mind he’d be worried about the sound of the bed traveling. He feels Erwin reach his peak and allows himself to release at the same time to avoid one having to finish the other off.

His orgasm is so violent he practically snarls through it, grabbing Erwin’s shoulders, planting him firmly down against the bed so he doesn’t make any more movements.

It’s his second orgasm in a short amount of time and he’s overstimulated - his stamina on the battlefield doesn’t manifest in the bedroom as much as he would like. He lifts off Erwin, his thighs trembling. 

He finally allows himself to look at Erwin: his cheeks and neck are slightly reddened from exertion and his chest is heaving. He still looks steeped in pleasure, his hand rests against his forehead, his hair pushed back in a mess of blond.

“You always seem so angry when you orgasm,” Erwin pants, amused.

“I have a lot on my mind.”

Levi collapses down next to him on the bed and Erwin lets him, giving him the entirety of a second before rolling over on top of him with surprising energy, kissing him deeply on the mouth. He pauses and looks directly into his eyes.

“Levi…”

“Yes,” says Levi, still light-headed from the aftermath of their sex.

Erwin licks his lips, staring, like he’s never been in a position like this before, where the words don’t come to him. 

Levi feels the fear crawl up his spine again. He kisses Erwin instead of waiting for him and Erwin’s shoulder sag with the relief or maybe disappointment.

When their mouths detach, Erwin lowers his face and presses a kiss at the center of Levi’s chest then stays there with his cheek pressed against Levi’s sticky skin.

Levi stares at the ceiling, willing his heartbeat not to betray anything.

A few steps forward and another step back. Levi isn’t sure where they’re heading, but they might get there eventually.

**Author's Note:**

> these are my notes at the end.


End file.
